I’m a 27 year old woman who’s always been focused on her career. For the longest time, I prioritized work above everything else, and as a result, never got into any relationship. But over the past couple of years, I started feeling the need for a genuine, long term connection. I turned to dating apps, hoping to find something meaningful which I now realize was a bit naive.
Around the same time, I was planning to switch jobs and got an offer from a well known company. To understand the role better, I reached out to a guy from that company through LinkedIn. Our chats started off professionally, with a few calls here and there. But eventually, we began talking casually on WhatsApp. Не seemed interested in me, and I started opening up too.
We met once at a cafe, where we mostly discussed work. After that, due to our new roles and busy schedules, we didn’t talk much maybe once a month. The chats gradually faded. Then, about three months ago, we met again at a company event in another city. That evening, we had a few drinks with colleagues. Later, I went to his room to just chill, talk, and watch a series.
We had a long, deep conversation for about two hours. But unexpectedly, he made a physical move. I was surprised and unsure. I didn’t feel that way about him and resisted initially. But somehow, I let him get closer, even though it didn’t feel right. I felt uncomfortable and left for my room soon after. The next day, I was quiet, trying to process what happened. We didn’t talk much.
After returning home, I asked him where he saw this going. He said he enjoyed that night, but he wasn’t looking for anything serious more like a friends with benefits kind of thing. That hit me hard. I had let my guard down, let someone in, and it ended with nothing but disappointment.
Since then, our chats have been purely work related. No casual talks, no asking how I’m doing. I even suggested we could keep things casual not because I wanted it, but because I just didn’t want to lose that connection. But he wasn’t interested anymore. I felt used. Now, my family is actively searching for a groom, and I’m also on matrimonial apps.
But all I seem to attract are either guys who ghost or those who only want physical intimacy. It’s frustrating. I just want someone genuine someone who understands commitment. I still think about that night. It keeps coming back. I get attached easily, and no matter how much I try, I haven’t been able to forget him. I feel like I was nothing more than a moment for him, while it meant so much more to me.
I cry often, feeling like I let myself down. If anyone has been through something similar, how did you move on? I’m trying, but it’s hard.
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