My Roommate’s Shocking Confession Left Me Obsessed

Hi everyone, I need to share something that’s been weighing on me, and I could really use your honest advice. For clarity, the names I’m using here are not real to protect everyone’s privacy. My roommate Swathi (mid-30s) and I (early 30s) both work in the high-pressure world of IT industry, where stress is a constant companion.

Living in California, we have heard plenty about edibles and decided to try some gummies for the first time to unwind after a particularly grueling week at work. We got our hands on some and, feeling a bit adventurous, gave them a go. We laughed a lot, even kissed in the heat of the moment. Nothing happened after that, it was casual and crazy, maybe the effect of the gummies and after a few hours.

We raided the kitchen, eating way too much food. That’s when we started sharing stories about our past relationships & regrets. I opened up about how I broke up with a guy during my B.Tech days, only to find out that a couple of years ago he became an IFS officer now serving in an Arab country.

That frustration ate at me for years, I was mad at everyone, including myself, and got caught up in office politics, gossiping and bad mouthing others until I was about 28. Since then, I have worked hard to change and grow. But what Swathi confessed next left me floored and shocked.

About ten years ago, when Swathi lived on the East Coast with her roommate Laya, there was a guy in their circle, a colleague of Laya’s who lived nearby. Swathi described him as someone who could light up a room with his humor and genuine kindness. One day, when she was at a low point after losing her job, he came over to lift her spirits.

In a moment of vulnerability, Swathi impulsively hugged him due to the crush she had developed over a period of time, but he gently pulled away and admitted he had feelings for Laya. He asked her to keep it quiet, wanting to tell Laya himself when the timing felt right. What happened next was heart breaking. Feeling humiliated and hurt, Swathi lied to Laya, claiming he had tried to kiss and hug her.

Laya cut him off immediately. When he reached out to Swathi for answers, she ghosted him. Just like that, he lost his chance with Laya and two close friendships because of one spiteful lie. That night, Swathi broke down, talking about karma and wondering if this was why her love life has felt cursed ever since and she still is unmarried.

By morning, though, she acted like the conversation never happened, dodging my questions with vague excuses. Here is where it gets complicated for me. The way Swathi described this man, his integrity, his warmth has stuck with me in a way I can’t shake. Maybe because I watch a lot of K-drama, I’ve never met him, but her words painted such a vivid picture that I became obsessed.

Based on her confession, I tried digging into it myself, piecing together details from her story to track him down online. I think I might have found him a LinkedIn profile that seems to match but now I’m frozen.  Should I reach out to tell him the truth after all these years? Or would that just stir up old pain? I’m torn, so I need your help:

1. Should I contact this guy to set the record straight, or would that risk reopening wounds for him and others?

2. Should I confront Swathi again, even though she clearly wants to bury this?

3. Am I projecting my own loneliness onto a stranger I’ve built up in my head?

Working in IT, I’m used to solving problems logically, but this feels like a minefield of emotions and ethics. I’m caught between wanting to right a wrong and worrying I’m crossing boundaries. What would you do in my shoes?

You can share all your Confessions with me over Gmail or Google Chat Praveenpandu6102@gmail.com

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