I Never had a relationship. Had a one sided love once in college. Coming to the present I met a girl through matrimony in an arranged marriage setup. We talked on the phone for 4 months (mostly on weekends, due to different cities and corporate jobs), after meeting once in person in the presence of both families. During those 4 months, she never explicitly said she loved me, but she kept dropping “hints” like how she only opens up to special people.
I had made it very clear that I didn’t want to stop talking to her, and that’s why I said yes to marriage. Then her family came to visit our home. Yes, our home is old and located in a small rural town – but it’s built with cement and bricks, not mud. I work in one of the major IT hubs in southern India, have a solid job in a product based company, and earn well enough to take responsibility for a family in a metropolitan city.
She also earns a decent salary and stays in northern India. During the visit, I noticed her family didn’t like our house at all. Her father seemed interested in only one thing how much property and generational wealth we had. That disgusted me, but maybe that’s just how arranged marriages work now. My family didn’t like theirs either, and we sensed clearly they were unimpressed by our home.
Despite all that, I still hoped deep down that she might stand up and convince her family because I genuinely cared. Next day, all I got was a four liner text from her some vague message that basically said “no” to the marriage. I wasn’t just heartbroken by the rejection. I was shattered by how it was delivered. No conversation, no explanation, no honesty. Just a message.
Then, the status updates started. Every day, sad WhatsApp statuses. I began thinking maybe she was forced to say no by her family. Maybe she loved me but couldn’t fight for us. I cried. I genuinely cried. I blamed myself for not doing enough to make her fall in love with me. I thought maybe if I had done more, things could’ve been different.
Then came the real punch. A new status: “I don’t love you anymore” or something along those lines. It was like someone slapped me across the face and laughed while doing it. She ended things not me and then claimed I was the one who couldn’t move on? I couldn’t take it. I called her and asked why. Her reply? “Those statuses weren’t about you. They were about a friend. I never had any feelings for you.”
That moment? Second slap. Right in the gut. Every bit of hope and dignity I had left, crushed. Weeks passed. I still couldn’t stop thinking about her. I called her again and asked stupidly can we still talk like we used to? She said, “Yes, as friends.” Third and final slap. I was never anything to her but an emotional placeholder.
Question: Should I have done something to make her fall in love with me and agree to marriage?
Option 1: Yes
Option 2: No
You can share all your Confessions with me over Gmail or Google Chat Praveenpandu6102@gmail.com or Telegram @PraveenPandu