There’s something I want to share with you something that’s been weighing on me for a while. I was in love with her. Deeply. It still aches when I think about it. My heart, my mind everything still clings to the memories we created. She was my world, and I always find myself drifting back to those moments we had together.
There’s this one memory I keep replaying it makes me laugh and ache at the same time. We had a fight, a silly argument over something so insignificant that I don’t even remember what it was. She was upset, curled up in bed, and I couldn’t stand seeing her like that. So, I woke her up and told her, “Let’s go get some fried chicken.”
She was half asleep but immediately excited only for me to say, “Actually, we’re not going. You just get happy because you rob my money!”
Man, I’ll never forget the way her face fell when I said that. She was so disappointed. But I couldn’t keep her sad for long. I hugged her, and then I took her out for real. The way she smiled, the way she laughed that night it’s something I’ll carry with me forever.
But I wasn’t perfect. I was young, just 24, and trying to make something of myself. I had dreams and ambitions, and sometimes those things came first not because I didn’t love her, but because I didn’t know how to balance my career and the love we shared. But even in the midst of all that, my love for her was pure. She was my everything.
I remember when I was just starting out, struggling through my QSA assessments and interviews, and she was my biggest supporter. She was so excited for me, even when things were uncertain. When I finally got that 60k job, her face lit up like I had accomplished something huge. We used to joke that I needed to earn one lakh a month to win her over. And now, here I am, almost earning that much.
But the truth is, none of that matters anymore. I have the job, the career but what’s the point without her? People talk about our age difference. She’s 33, I’m 24 but it never mattered to me. I didn’t care about that. I didn’t see her as just someone older. I saw her as someone who completed me. It was never about anything physical; I genuinely loved her more deeply than I can explain.
It was always about her the connection we had, the way she made me feel, the way I always wanted to be by her side. I worked so hard for us, and everything I achieved, I did with her in my thoughts. I never cheated on her, never betrayed what we had. The pain we experienced came from misunderstandings, miscommunications. But my heart was always with her. I never wanted to hurt her, and I wish she knew that.
Now, people ask me why I don’t care about my self-respect when it comes to her. Why I haven’t moved on. But how can I? How can I just let go of someone who was everything to me? She was there when I had nothing, and now that I’ve reached a point in my life where I’m more stable, I just want her back.
I know she’s strong, she acts cold and mature, but I know there’s still a part of her that’s the same girl I fell in love with the one who needs someone to tease her, make her laugh, and bring out that beautiful smile. I wonder how she reads my messages and stays silent, how she manages to keep that part of herself locked away.
I’ve tried everything to get her back. I’ve reached out to people I never thought I would, asking them to talk to her, to remind her of what we had. And yet, nothing. People tell me to take care of myself, that I should move on. But I can’t. I can’t just move on from someone who meant so much to me, who helped me become who I am today.
The thing is, I’m not angry. I’m not obsessed. I’m just trying to get back what we had. I’m giving it my all because she’s worth it. We’re worth it. And even now, I hope she understands. I hope that somehow, in her heart, she still remembers what we had the love, the laughter, the fights, the good times. I hope she knows that I’m still here, waiting, holding on to the hope that one day, she’ll come back into my life.
Question: I didn’t cheat on her. I’m 24 and she’s 32. I tried every possible way to convince her that I didn’t use her for physical things, but she still thinks I did. What should I do?
1. Just leave her and move on I’m young
2. Should I talk to her family?
3. Should I concentrate on my career only?