A 22 years old college student was in a relationship with his colleague for almost one and a half years. During this time, the guy was totally obsessed with her to the point that he couldn’t imagine a second of his life without her and frequently picked fights with his colleagues whenever they invited him to go out somewhere, just so he could be with her.
The girl had a history of depression due to family problems in the past, for which she had to be managed on an IP (inpatient) basis. Due to this, she always had temper tantrums and would start fights with him over even the silliest things. One day they would be laughing and playing, and the next day she would get triggered and stop talking to him. He had the sole responsibility of calming and consoling her.
This cycle continued, and at the end of one and a half years, he decided it couldn’t continue any further, as he was the only one putting in the effort to console her so he broke up with her. He was never the same after that. He started going to the gym post breakup, and almost a year passed. Then he started exhibiting strange behavior. I’m using the word “strange” because he had never behaved like this before.
He started hitting on every girl he saw, using a dating app and talking to matches initially one, but then chatting with two or three matches at the same time. During that period, he met another college girl. They matched on the app and started chatting. But this new girl looked very similar to his ex. She was studying in a college about a hundred kilometers away from ours, so it was a long distance relationship.
Even his friends used to comment on how similar she looked to his ex. He didn’t notice it at first until his friends pointed it out, but I don’t think he gave it much importance. They had sex multiple times something he didn’t do in his previous relationship. I remember the time he requested her to come over to our area just to book a room and be intimate, alongside the usual shopping and eating out.
All the while, he had an active profile on the dating app. Almost a year passed. Although she loved him very much, I don’t think he was equally reciprocating it. Then, afterward, he broke up with her, citing the same reason.
Question: What do you think about this?
Option 1: He’s a red flag
Option 2: This is normal behavior
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