It all started with an innocent friendship. We were best friends we knew each other inside out. Though we lived far apart, our bond felt stronger than distance. Even before we got into a relationship, I knew he had a girlfriend, but they were on the verge of breaking up. She moved on first, found someone else, and that’s when he started giving me more attention. Our friendship deepened. He told me he saw something special in me, and soon he asked me to be more than just friends.
I said yes not out of desperation, but because I saw a kind, loving man, someone who made me feel wanted and safe. But I guess I was wrong. Soon after we got together, his ex popped back into his life playing the “damsel in distress” card, and he fell for it. He started talking to her again, helping her, while slowly distancing himself from me. And when I confronted him, he didn’t deny it. He just said, “I’m not in a state to handle a relationship.” Excuse me?! You had the energy to be her emotional support, but not mine?
Still, I was patient. I backed off emotionally, tried to be the understanding “friend” first just like he wanted. I gave him space. I told him I’d wait, even though deep down I was breaking. And what did I get in return? Excuses. Suddenly, his family wouldn’t approve. Suddenly, he didn’t believe in love anymore. But he still wanted to talk to me, hear me out, listen to my rants, respond with comforting words just not commit. What kind of emotional torture is this?
He made me believe that someday, maybe, we’d be together that he was just scared. And I clung to that hope. For two whole years, I waited. I begged. I prayed. I even stopped contacting him, thinking maybe if I disappear, he’ll realize my worth. But he didn’t. He never reached out. I called maybe 2 to 3 times in all that time, and now suddenly he says he still “doesn’t care”? Yet he picks up my calls, replies to my texts why?
He says he doesn’t love me, but his actions scream otherwise. He gives me hope, only to crush it. Every word, every touch, every meeting feels like a breadcrumb trail leading nowhere. I’m mentally exhausted, emotionally drained, and I feel like a fool for loving someone who never truly chose me. I gave him my purest love without demands, without conditions. And he gave me confusion, silence, and mixed signals. I’ve been holding on because I believe love is worth it. But now I don’t even know if I’m loving a person or just a memory of what he pretended to be.
Question: What should I do?
Option 1: Let him go and heal
Option 2: Keep loving without expectations, and leave the rest to fate