I am 20 years Girl and met a 20 years male boyfriend in the first year of my college. We were friends initially. He portrayed himself as a super rich guy and always belittled others, saying, “Our college people are not my type. They’re roadside people,” and so on. He constantly judged people based on money. I don’t know why, but I liked him since the first year.
One day in the second year, we went clubbing and kissed. Two to three months later, he asked me for a commitment. At that moment, he said, “I don’t know about marriage, but we’ll be loyal to each other as long as this works.” I committed to him because all I wanted was his love not just a fling, but real love.
Since then, we had a good relationship for 4 to 5 months. You know, love was in the air. But he used to split every single bill with me literally everything. And he wanted me to give him “wifey vibes,” which I eventually did because he said after marriage there wouldn’t be any issues, as he came from a very wealthy family.
Eventually, one day, he said that even after marriage we would split all expenses. At that moment, I thought is this how I want to be treated for life? As a woman, I obviously want to be independent and succeed in life, but I also want a man who believes in chivalry and doesn’t put financial responsibilities entirely on me. And coming from a wealthy family, saying something like that felt so contradictory, right?
Still, I continued the relationship. Now it had been almost 1.5 years. One day, I asked his cousin brother who is also my college friend about his background and everything. Eventually, I found out he had faked everything: his house, cars, dogs, business literally everything. At this point, I asked his brother why he never told me, and he said he had no idea that my boyfriend lied to me.
From his point of view, he was right because if he had warned me earlier and I confronted my boyfriend, he would’ve looked like the bad guy. So, eventually, I broke up with him. Because what is love, really? Love is trust and respect. He never trusted or respected me enough to tell me the truth. He even said he’s not in a position to ask me for a relationship anymore.
But later, he started contacting me again, trying to get back together. He said he didn’t make such a huge mistake that I should leave him. And now, I see him almost every day in college. But I can’t trust him at all anymore. I feel like I was scammed. Everything he says now feels like a lie, and I don’t want to spend my entire life trying to figure out whether he’s telling the truth or not.
I have developed multiple trust issues because I trusted him blindly and believed we would become a happy, loving couple. But how do I trust him again? Will it lead to more fights? Was my decision to leave him right?
Question: Should I give him another chance?
1: Yes
2: No
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