So back in 2021, I fell for a guy pretty hard and he kind of liked me too. I was thinking I’m in a relationship, but he always denied it and said we can’t be more than friends. But at the same time, we were doing everything that a normal couple would do. This “relationship” lasted for almost a year. But then came a day when he said, “I can’t do this anymore, we should split up,.”
And I took it very maturely kind off hurt, but was okay. Then after 6 months, I joined college and I was doing good, both in health and studies. Then came a guy actually a senior. At first, we started talking normally, and then eventually started dating. He was kind of religious, but I must say a fake one. Our relationship lasted for only 2 months, and in those 2 months, he broke up with me like 3 times.
The reason every time was, “No, it’s a sin, we’re not allowed to do this.” And I was so dumb like, whenever he used to come back and say, “Oh, I can’t live without you” and all that, I used to believe him. But one day, he started that drama again, and that time I decided to let him go forever. Around that same time, I was going through this shitty breakup, and one guy came into my life.
He’s my batchmate, and he really supported me and cared about me. We started talking, and then I came to know he had a crush on me since the first day of college. I made it clear to him that I had two bad breakups and I can’t be in a relationship right now. I told him I don’t want relationships anymore. He was like, “Okay, we’ll just be friends.”
Then some bad things happened in my life, one after another. But he never left my side. Whether it was 3 in the morning or any time, he was always there for me. And eventually, that made me fall in love (or what I thought was love). He is everything a girl can ask for literally a walking green flag, or you can say a green forest. He always takes care of me. He stays with me 24/7 literally 24/7.
He never goes out with friends or anything because he knows I don’t have any friends and doesn’t want to leave me alone. He loves me more than anyone, and he is the most loving, caring, loyal human I know. I know every little detail about him, his day, everything. He tells me everything and never does anything without asking me.
But the thing is, when he makes even a small mistake, I get so hyper and angry, which I never used to be with the other guys before him. I’ve become so toxic and bad that I feel bad for him. Sometimes, I don’t even care that he’s ill or in a bad mood. I don’t care about him. Sometimes, I treat him like a slave or something. And I know I’m wrong for doing this, and I should tell him.
I should leave him or treat him better. But I don’t want to. I feel jealous thinking when I leave him, who will love and care for me like he does? I just don’t know whether I should leave him or not. I don’t know whether I love him or not.
Question: What should I do?
1. Should I leave him?
2. Or is there something else I can do?
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