In 2021, I was working for a company from home. I met this guy during an office outing, as it was WFH and our contract was supposed to end, so a few of us planned an outing. This guy saw me and started talking to me. After a few days, he started talking to me randomly, just like a normal colleague. Then, he confessed his feelings at the end of the year. Still, I said no because he was 3 years younger than me. So, he stopped talking to me.
Then he showed up in May 2022 and confessed his feelings in person again. I said no because of the age gap and our compatibility issues, as he was a rich guy who only wore brands and only talked about brands. I am a middle class girl who can’t afford brands and loves to stay within my boundaries. He didn’t stop there. He kept trying to convince me, so one day I said yes. He used to take me to his flat to talk almost 3 to 4 times, and when I asked him why we were meeting there, he said he wanted to keep it private until we got married, and if someone saw us, it would be a problem for him.
But then he asked me for sex, which I denied, as I wanted to do it only after marriage. I wanted to know more about him and his family, but he never shared many details. I don’t even know his siblings’ names. Whenever I asked, he said, “I am there, na? Why do you want to know all this?” I kept quiet, and suddenly one day he disappeared. He started ghosting me. He left me without saying a word. I tried my best to contact him like a mad person.
I used to send texts in paragraphs every day, but he didn’t respond to even one. He was the kind of person who didn’t like to talk on calls. I was in shock and pain. Why did he do that? He was the one who made me fall in love with him. When I joined a new company, I started forgetting him, but I used to see his online status on WhatsApp daily. He never followed me on Instagram, nor did he ever accept my request. The only way I had to see him was WhatsApp. We were in no contact for more than a year.
Then he sent a text in December 2023 saying he wanted to fix our relationship. But I was not ready since he had left me in pain. He kept trying to convince me. He started making the efforts I had always wanted from him calling daily, texting, asking proactively to meet just to talk. Still, I wasn’t ready. I kept denying meeting or talking to him. I blocked him on WhatsApp. Then he messaged me on Instagram and accepted my request which had been pending since 2021. He begged me to meet. So I finally decided to meet him, but I was strong with my decision.
He kept begging me to be with him, saying he had changed and realized his mistakes. So in July 2024, I decided to give him another chance and said okay. But guess what? The moment I got convinced, he started doing the same thing ignoring me, not calling, always giving work pressure as a reason. I asked him to take out some time at least once a week, but he didn’t. Sometimes he did, sometimes he didn’t. Whenever I asked for time, he called me toxic and always complaining. In every argument, he used to say, “I want to end this, I don’t want you anymore.”
But after a week, he’d come back for a patch up. Our relationship kept going like that. Then in March 2025, he dropped some papers and shared his feelings about future goals. I was ready to support him in every way. We met in April, and he said he would get married next year that we would make it happen. He gave me many promises and hopes. But we had an argument on April 6, and he started ignoring me and blocked me. On April 30, he sent “???” thinking I had blocked him, which I hadn’t.
He asked me to meet him at his friend’s flat, saying he wanted to talk about something important. I asked him if he was getting married. He said, “No, baba.” He insisted I come, so I traveled two hours to meet him. He told me he couldn’t continue. When I asked why, he said, “Today is my last day at work. After this, I won’t have a job or money, so I can’t continue. Also, you are always complaining about time.” He was so heartless he didn’t even say bye. He was busy on his phone. When I asked why he was hiding his phone, he said, “Think whatever you want.”
He got a few WhatsApp notifications. When I asked whose messages those were, he said they were from CRED just promotional messages. I tried to see, but he snatched his phone from my hand and scolded me. Even that day, he hurt me with his words. I took it because I loved him. While leaving his place, he was on the phone with his manager and said he would call me. But he didn’t not even a text. After reaching home, I sent him some messages saying he needs to change his behavior. The very next day, after reading them, he blocked me.
On May 11, while scrolling Instagram, I saw his friend’s story he got married. I was shocked and panicked. I called him, but he didn’t respond. I sent him texts, and he replied saying, “This is your problem you always come up with some issues.” He claimed it was just a post event photo, even though he was wearing a garland, a ring, a saafa, and full groom attire. He wasn’t ready to admit that he was married. He kept lying and blaming me. When I replied to his friend’s story asking, “Is he getting married?” his friend replied the next day, saying “Got.”
But this guy kept lying that he wasn’t. He pretended like I had cheated or left him. But when I told him his bestie had confirmed it, he left me on “seen” and blocked me from calling too. All I asked was why did he do this to me? If he already had someone else, or if his marriage was fixed, why did he waste 4 years of my life? Why did he give me a reason that he couldn’t marry me because he didn’t have a jo only to get married in just 10 days?
Was I just an option for him all these years? He never prioritized me. He never even gave me a ₹1 chocolate, never took me out for a date, never did anything for me. But he blamed me, saying he wasted 4 years chasing me. On the other hand, I helped him in every situation. I’m still getting panic attacks. I can’t concentrate on anything. I’ve lost myself. Where did I go wrong?