I Got Semi Nude For My Drunk Best Friend

I’m a 25 years old woman, and I’ve never been in a relationship. Three years ago, I met a guy, and we instantly became great friends. Within a month, I developed feelings for him, and he realized it. However, he told me he wasn’t ready for a relationship. I wanted to stop talking to him, but since we were already good friends, I couldn’t. Deep down, I always hoped he might change his mind. Now, we’re best friends (with feelings on my end, as far as I know). We live in different cities, but yesterday he went to a party and got drunk.

After he got home, he called me, and since I was awake too, we ended up chatting on a FaceTime video call. After a while, he asked if he could see my breasts, which shocked and surprised me. I felt confused. He made it clear that I could comfortably say no if I didn’t want to. Honestly, I didn’t want to, but I was scared of losing him, so I went ahead and got semi nude. We agreed to never speak about it again and ended the call. Since then, I haven’t been in the right frame of mind. My thoughts have been racing.

I’ve never been in a relationship or physically intimate with anyone before. I don’t exactly “regret” what I did, but I feel like I shouldn’t have done it. It also feels like the affection and feelings I had for him have collapsed. I’m not mad at him, and I don’t blame him. At the same time, I keep wondering if this means he loves me or if it was just a random moment (he had a girlfriend before we met and has been single since, without being physically intimate with anyone).

I’ve always wanted to date and eventually marry the same guy, but now I’m not sure what’s happening. I wouldn’t force either of us into a relationship just because of what happened. But I’m very nervous and confused right now. I don’t want to discuss this with my friends, so I’m unsure if others who’ve experienced something similar feel the same.