This might be a long one as this story spans over 4 years, so please bear with me. I met a guy online 4 years ago. He was a typical nerd thin, but a good hearted guy, just a year older than me. I slowly started liking him. He used to share everything with me. When he got placed on campus in his job, I was the 4th person he informed (the first 3 were his parents and brother). He said he loved sharing everything with me.
After talking for 7 to 8 months, he proposed to me, but I rejected him, as I wanted to focus on my career then. I did this with a heavy heart. I had also been given wrong advice about him by my friends. He kept persuading me for almost a year after that. One day out of frustration, I told him, “I am not interested in you. I never was.”
To this, he called me an attention seeker and schooled me about a grammatical mistake I had made in that message. He said that I couldn’t write proper English even after pursuing a BA in it for 3 years. Out of anger, I blocked him. Later, I unblocked him after 3 months, only to realize he had also blocked me. We lost touch.
Cut to last year, I saw him at a cousin’s wedding. His elder brother was getting married to my cousin. They had met on a matrimonial site and dated for a year before getting married. His brother was almost 5 years older than him and working at Amazon as an SDE, while my cousin was also an SDE at another company.
Meanwhile, he had also switched to a different company from the one he got placed in. I came to know about this through discussions among my relatives. I thought of talking to him, so I went and said hi. He said he didn’t recognize me and ignored me. I hadn’t expected such a cold reply from him.
Now I also have a good career, job, and since I had always liked him and had never been with anyone after rejecting him, I thought of being together with him again. A few weeks after my cousin’s marriage, I called her and told her everything about us and my feelings for him. She told me that she would talk to him regarding us. But when she called me a few days later, I felt like the earth had slipped from under my feet.
She told me to never talk to her about him again and to leave him alone. She said that in the 1 year she knew him, he had told her he had been rejected by a girl, but she didn’t know it was me, and how much effort she and her husband had put in to bring him back from depression. She said he had shown her the chats between us (he had saved them on his Google Drive and used to read them almost every day).
She scolded me for disrespecting him and said that she would get a far better girl for him than me, someone who would respect him. She had also made him delete those chats forever. The worst part is that just before calling me, she had called my parents and asked them to keep me away from him. She had pulled everybody into a conference call her husband, her in-laws, my parents and said all this, except me.
Now I cry every night thinking about what life could’ve been had I accepted his proposal 3 years or even 2years ago.
Question: What can I do?
Option 1: Still contact him and confess why I left him
Option 2: Talk to parents and contact his parents
Option 3: Forget him